The Alex Fluff Chronicles
by rantandrumour
Summary: A promise to the Tumblr community that I'd be nice to Alex...series of one and possibly 2 shots...some naughtiness along the way that MAY (is) not Galex... oops... (Also...I just filled out the genres and it's really weird to see Humor/Friendship there...IT FEELS WRONG)


**Okay...**

**So I said I wasn't going to be back...and I don't think I will for long, but I know that I DID promise about...12 or 13 chapters of Alex fluff...I was asked about them the other day on tumblr and well...I have a few scenes...Like a cut scene from The Long and Winding Road and future scenes of Iuro Omnes Vivere...(which is this one...) Soooooooooo...Enjoy!**

* * *

**This is a scene post Iuro Omnes Vivere. It may not make sense unless you've read IOV.**

Mark walked next to Alex, slightly stumbling from her weight leaning against him. At the very least, Alex was incredibly pissed, and at the most, only a few minutes from passing out. They hadn't planned to get plastered, but one drink had led to another, which had ended up in shots and the night got away from them. Alex had long ago forgotten to call him 'Arthur,' but he had long forgotten that he had two different identities.

"We never...d...di..did this before," Alex slurred, leaning almost all of her body weight on him.

"We've never been out together before," Mark said, in only a slightly more coherent state.

"We should get a taxi."

Mark nodded in agreement and stumbled into the street in front of a taxi that was coming down the road. As it screeched to a stop, letting the horn blare loudly, Mark held up his arms, waving at it as Alex nearly fell over laughing.

"Careful!" she called, a bit too late.

Mark grinned at her, walking over to the driver's window. "I need a ride," he slurred, not noticing as the cabbie visually recoiled from his breath.

"Do you have anything left to spend on a taxi?" the driver asked rudely. "Or did you spend it all in the pub?"

"Rude," Alex said, clambering in the back, half crawling.

"Lex, where do you live?" Mark asked.

"I don't know."

"You should do. You live there."

The cabbie sighed. "Does she have a driving licence?"

"She can't drive tonight, mate. She's pissed."

The cabbie sighed wearily again. "Give me her driving licence and I can find her address, can't I?" he asked.

"You're sodding brilliant, mate," Mark said, starting to dig through Alex's jacket.

Alex pushed him away, as she was still wearing it. She dug through it herself, eventually locating the driving licence she had stowed away in one of the many pockets.

Alex thrust the license forward to the man and he looked at it before giving it back disgustedly. "Are you going to the same location?" he asked Mark.

Mark nodded, throwing some notes up front to the cabbie. "For your trouble. That should cover the fare too"

The cabbie looked at the money delightedly and drove off, not showing his disgust for the rest of the journey to Gene and Alex's house. They stumbled out of the car, only slightly more sober, and meandered up to the door, laughing raucously. As they approached the front step, the door opened, the two twins standing in front, Gene and Sarah walking up behind them.

"Jesus Christ," the boy said. "What did Arthur do to Mum?"

The girl looked just as shocked. "Mum?" she asked softly.

"Lily!" Alex crowed. "My Lily!" She stumbled up the step, nearly collapsing on her daughter, hugging her tightly. "Sixteen years ago, she loved me so much, she didn't want to leave the womb!"

"Mum," Lily pleaded, looking extremely embarrassed.

"Alex, c'mere," Gene said, looking at Mark, his face thunderous. He turned to his children. "Go upstairs you two. And tomorrow morning, you two make as much noise as you want."

They grinned at each other, identical, mischievous smiles.

"Geeeene!" Alex squealed as he pulled her into his arms. "Did you miss me, Gene? Did you watch your _movies_ all day?" she asked dramatically.

"What the hell did you do to her?" Gene asked accusingly.

Mark shrugged. "A beer here...twelve shots there...I lose track..."

"Arthur!" Sarah admonished. "What the hell were you thinking?"

Mark grinned. "Dunno," he said as Alex pushed Gene away and wandered in the direction of the kitchen. Gene sighed and followed her. Mark looked at Sarah, and then followed Gene and Alex, the stupid grin never leaving his face. As they walked in, Gene and Alex were wrestling over an open bottle of wine.

"You've had enough!" Gene said, trying to wrestle it out of her hands.

"No!" Alex yelled. "Mark. MARK HELP ME!" she yelled. "GET THE WINE!"

She suddenly pulled it out of Gene's grip and threw it at Mark, who, incredibly, caught it with one hand. He pulled the cork out and drank deeply.

"Give me some," Alex wheedled, but Gene was in the way.

"I think Gene wants some!" Mark taunted.

"Give me the sodding wine, Evans," Gene said.

Mark grinned stupidly. "Okay," he said. "Wine it is." With that, he shook the uncorked bottle at Gene, covering him in wine.

"Arthur!" Sarah said, astonished at his behaviour. She had never seen him this drunk before. Indeed, he didn't think he had been this drunk since the days of the homemade still in school. "Apologise!" she demanded.

Mark grinned at Gene, walking forward. "Sorry, mate," he said, committing the highest offence of all.

He pulled Gene into him, hugging him tightly, spilling wine all down his back.

This was too much for Gene's short temper and monstrous ego and Mark felt himself being pulled away right before a fist connected with his eye, knocking him unconscious.

~(*)~

It was the sun shining in the room that woke him. He was lying on a couch on his stomach, his head on the side, hanging over a rubbish bin. His head was pounding, his stomach rolling, and it felt like someone had coated his mouth in sandpaper. He looked around the room, trying to get his bearings, trying to remember what had happened the night before.

Mark finally recognised the house as Gene and Alex's and frowned. He had stayed the night here?

He tried desperately to remember what had happened the previous day, but after the third pub, everything had gone hazy.

His eye suddenly started throbbing in unison with his head. Mark touched it gingerly, surprised to find that it was bruised. He frowned, trying desperately to remember what had happened, but everything was still escaping him. Mark sat up on the couch, trying to control the nausea that overwhelmed him. Luckily, he managed not to vomit, and was taking a few steadying breaths when someone threw a pot down in the kitchen.

Mark cursed and covered his ears as it clanged around, intensifying his headache. There was loud laughter in the kitchen, Gene and his children and...was that Sarah?

Curious, and in serious need of paracetamol, Mark wandered into the kitchen, realising that he wasn't wearing any shoes. As he entered, the four looked up. Gene was glowering at him for some reason, and Sarah didn't look very happy either. Mark didn't care at this point, he had just realised that his bladder was about to burst.

"Loo?" he rasped.

"First door on the right, straight upstairs," the boy said loudly. Mark winced and Gene smirked. He ignored it, walking upstairs, and locking the door behind him.

After the sweet, blessed relief that came with relieving his bladder, Mark searched for paracetamol. He made a noise of delight as he found them, tossing back a couple and splashing some water in his mouth to swallow. Finally, he looked in the mirror, letting out a yelp of surprise when he found out that he was only looking at himself through one and a half eyes. His right eye was swollen partially shut. Did he get in a fight?

Try as he might, he could not remember anything about the night before.

Mark opened the door and walked out, running into Alex. She was wearing a t-shirt and what looked like a pair of Gene's boxers underneath a dressing gown. She looked about as rough as he felt.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I have absolutely no idea," he responded. "I woke up on your sofa. And apparently, Sarah's here too."

Alex frowned. "What happened to you?" she asked, gingerly touching his eye.

"No clue."

"So you don't remember last night?"

Mark shook his head woefully. "Do you?"

"Not after the second pub."

Mark gave a small laugh. "We must have been totally hammered last night."

"Shall we go face our spouses?" Alex asked. "I have a feeling neither will be too happy with us."

"No. Let's go hide somewhere. Change our names, identities so we never have to face that."

"You already did that once."

"Oh yeah...well then, I guess we have no alternative..." Mark grabbed her hand and led her down the stairs. They broke apart at the bottom, walking into the kitchen tentatively.

"Hi Mum!" Lily said loudly and cheerfully.

They both winced. "Not so loud, Lil," Alex said softly.

"Nope," Gene said, just as loudly. "They have my express permission to be as loud as possible. After the state you two turned up in last night..."

"What happened?" Mark asked, as they sat down and Sarah shoved two steaming mugs of black coffee in front of them.

"Well, you two got here, embarrassed Lily, shouted and threw wine about, before spilling it all over me."

"After that," Sarah continued, "Mark, I told you to apologise and you hugged Gene. You spilled wine all down his back and so he punched you."

"You're the reason I have the black eye?"

Gene nodded proudly.

"Gene!" Alex admonished. "Sarah, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," she said, eyeing Mark angrily. "After the way he acted last night, he deserved it."

"So after _I_ was punched, what happened?"

"You conked out," Gene said. "Sarah couldn't carry you home, so I dragged you to the sofa and gave you a nice rubbish bin to barf in. Alex had to visit the loo for a bit, and was calling the toilet her friend by the end, before she eventually passed out."

"Gene gave me the guest room."

Mark and Alex smiled at each other guiltily. Last night they were just supposed to go out for drinks, not get blitzed.

"So this morning when you two were still passed out, Gene and I had a nice long discussion...and we decided that the only suitable punishment is for him and Mark to spend an afternoon together."

"That's not fair," Mark whined. "I get _him_ and Alex gets nothing?"

"It's punishment for me too, Ev...Newton..." Gene growled.

"And Alex does," Sarah said.

"You get to take us out for the afternoon, Mum!" Lily said cheerfully. "And you get to go where we want."

"And we want to go to _Brighton!"_ her son said.

Alex hung her head. "To the funfair, right?"

The twins grinned. "And you have to go on _every ride _with us, Mum!"

"I've got the worst end of the deal," Alex said miserably.

"Shut it, Bolly," Gene said. "Just drink some damn water and take some paracetamol and you'll be golden."

"So, Gene," Mark said, finishing his coffee. "What's our itinerary."

Gene grinned. "Football match. Meet me here at noon. Shower, and shave that stupid animal off your chin. You look ridiculous with a beard."

Mark raised his eyebrows, but said nothing.

Alex was staring into her coffee woefully. "I'll see you later, Arthur," she said miserably.

"Good luck," he murmured as Sarah appeared with his shoes and a look of irritation.

"You too," she murmured back as she saw Sarah's look. "Don't get murdered on the way home."

"I'll try not to," he said.

They walked out the door, but Gene yelled after them.

"Noon sharp! Any later and you get another black eye!"

Mark and Sarah got in the car and he looked at his watch.

"We better get going then," Mark said. "That only gives me an hour."

**Also, for those of you who like Mark's story (or just want to find out more about the _still)_...I've got a chapter up on fictionpress about his childhood under rantandrumour...those chapters will probably come more quickly than the FLUFF.**

**...I'm being sadistic...to myself...**

**WHY DID I AGREE TO DO THIS?!**


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